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#164651 - 05/14/08 07:16 AM too not getting along with husband  
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jennie Offline
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jennie  Offline
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Canada
My Goffin, Griffin, is petrified of my husband. This is not a good thing as it is important for them to at least tolerate each other. I need some ideas on how to get Griffin to be unafraid of him, Griffin will not accept treats or anything from him so that wont work. Should he force Griffin to come to him, or will that make it worse?


Jennie
#164656 - 05/14/08 10:21 AM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: jennie]  
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BE2Cassie Offline
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Jennie don't have him force it. But have him sit near his cage talking to him in a soft voice a couple of times a day. Even if it's for just a few minutes. Also it would be good if he gave him one meal a day. It's important that you not be around during this because he'll only want you. When I first got Cassie she was afraid of my husband and would bite him whenever he tried to interact with her. We started having him give her the afternoon snack bowl before I got home from work. She quickly started coming out for him and would be great with him until I got home. As soon as I got home she would not want anything to do with him. Now four years later they are best friends. Nancy


Nancy & Cassie BE2
#164659 - 05/14/08 02:00 PM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: BE2Cassie]  
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hellobaby Offline
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It's not a good idea to force things. You all need to take time and earn his trust above everything. How long has Griffin been around your husband?


If you must cripple a creature
to keep it, perhaps you should
reconsider its suitability as a pet.
#164663 - 05/14/08 06:24 PM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: hellobaby]  
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jtreuth Offline
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My U2 is petrified of my hubby also. He will quiver and shake when he is within 3ft. He also moves real slow while he is shaking and quivering. Every time my husband has just stood there and talked sweet to him, the same thing has happened, he got bit. Be careful.

#164664 - 05/14/08 07:30 PM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: jtreuth]  
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Mona Offline
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I have a Grey that doesn't like my husband. I think it's a jealousy issue as is often the case. He will walk over to my husband, climb up on his recliner with the intention of biting him. It's actually funny hearing my husband call to me to come and get Max, he's after me again...lol..

My Goffins used to be afraid of my husband also and flew or ran when he came near her.

After 2 years of my husband simply speaking softly when she was in the room and never aggressively approaching her, she finally has gotten to the point where she doesn't run when he walks past her playstand, and will now accept a treat from him. This took TWO years.

Never try to force a bird to "like" someone. It doesn't work and can actually make matters worse.

Patience is the key word here. The bird may eventually begin to trust your husband when the BIRD is ready, and not before. It may never happen so acceptance is also very important.


Last edited by Mona; 05/14/08 07:32 PM.
#164674 - 05/15/08 04:05 AM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: Mona]  
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Bird Mom Offline
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It took many months before Brewster accepted my husband...he mostly liked my son...who was 10 at the time. Be patient and don't push the bird to accept anyone. Brewster still seems afraid of his hands but will step up & allow cuddling. It's been 2 long years to make better progress!


Gail
#164679 - 05/15/08 04:56 AM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: Bird Mom]  
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TiKa's Dad Offline
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When Tika (12yr old U2)came to us he was bonded to a divorced woman. Within days of arriving he chose my wife and "claimed her". My wife loves all the birds as much as I do but "I" am the caregiver.

In the beginning I sustained some nasty bites (mostly my fault because of ignorance) but he was genuinely mean and did not want me around at all. I could not handle him at all. I used a T-stick to move and handle him. Now this is the only way he will travel with me and insists on it. The other U2 will not go near the stick. Tika will not go anywhere without it.

The solution here was time and patience. Your husband must take a more active role in the birds life. Small steps of course. He needs to do these things without you there. The bird has to know you are not there at all. Not just in the other room so he has to trust your husband. A neutral area where the bird is not attached to things like cage, playstand, etc, helps alot.

It took about 12 months to gain Tikas' full trust. He still loves my wife but we are good buddies.


John
Another 24 hours down. Only a lifetime to go. God speed! ~AngiesArk~ laugh
#164685 - 05/15/08 06:25 AM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: TiKa's Dad]  
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jennie Offline
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Thanx for all the tips. I figured that it will take time and patience, Ill try to get my hubby to start taking a more active role is Griffins care. We have only had Griffin for 7 months.


Jennie
#164786 - 05/16/08 05:34 PM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: jennie]  
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Dirtpilot Offline
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Cookie and my husband don't get along when im around... When im not there they are fine.

It certainly is a jealously thing for us and we just have learnt to accept it.


Kind regards
JACKIE
Cookie- GSC2, Buddy- GSC2, Mofo- W.A Galah,

I'ts the simple things in life...
#164899 - 05/18/08 08:23 AM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: Dirtpilot]  
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Dallas Offline
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When I first got Maverick my blue front he really liked my husband. Well Maverick wanted to go to him all the time. So my husband backed off a little bit because we got Maverick for me. Well now Maverick HATES my husband. He will attack my husband if he tries to pet him. Maverick has no problem excepting food from him while he is on his cage. Also when we go camping or Maverick is away from his cage he will then let my husband pet him. But he has to be in a totally differnt environment before he will let my husband pet him. While we are camping he will let my husband hold him.

#165187 - 05/21/08 04:16 AM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: Dallas]  
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TiKa's Dad Offline
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Dallas made a good point. Having your husband take the bird completely out of its element works very well. Such as a car ride, or a walk down the street to the park. Absolutely nothing will be familiar. Except your husband who he WILL trust. Of course avoid traumatic situations and try to have lots of fun.


John
Another 24 hours down. Only a lifetime to go. God speed! ~AngiesArk~ laugh
#165242 - 05/21/08 07:50 PM Re: too not getting along with husband [Re: TiKa's Dad]  
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Lori Conarro Offline
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In my opinion, having your husband take your goffins outside at this point is not a good thing. My goffins doesn't like to go outside, he's scared of cars and big white trucks and my car. It might just make your bird more nervous. Goffins are just that way.

Last edited by Lori Conarro; 05/21/08 07:50 PM. Reason: needed to add

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